Brother Ben, thanks for adding your personal insights to the subject. You hit on two areas that definitely create a problem in discussing this subject.
The terminology, though seemingly having a fixed meaning, actually varies a good bit from one Landmarker to another, not to mention the anti-landmarkers. And then there are those who have been raised on those doctrines absent the terminology. When I was growing up, I don't remember folks around here speaking of us in terms of being Landmark Baptists. We always called ourselves Missionary Baptists. I'm sure the preachers would have recognized the churches as Landmark Baptist -- even some of the churches and associations were so named. But I expect it was never common for the average church-goers to think of themselves or possibly even know they were Landmark Baptists. In fact, just the other day when I was discussing Landmark Baptists with a Landmark Baptist preacher, his father, a Baptist deacon, asked what we meant by Landmark.
When I was doing my independent Landmark Baptist church survey, I had one California pastor write, "Yes, we believe all those things, but don't want our church identified as Landmark Baptist. You can count us as a number if you'd like, but don't put our name on your list."
In southwest Missouri there are a number of "Old-time Missionary Baptists" that separated from the SBC circa 1950. They will tell you they are not Landmark Baptist. Yet they have the same ecclesiological beliefs/traits of Landmarkers. These "Old-time" Missionary Baptists in Missouri had contact with some Baptists who identified themselves as Landmarkers and they thought the Landmarkers were weak and sickly on allowing folks to join the churches without being able to relate a credible experience of salvation. So they are not impressed with that terminology.
This "name thing" is something that complicates the assessment of the extent of Landmarkism, not only among Southern Baptists, but Baptists in general. Also there is the problem of the definition. If some Landmarkers are allowed to define the term, it will be exactly what they are and nothing else. Ben, I think you'd agree, if Wade Burleson were allowed to define the term, probably all SBC'ers who hold any kind ofrestricted communion would be Landmarkers!
I came up with a kind of "lowest common denominator" idea for assessing the unaffiliated churches when I did the independent Landmark Baptist survey. I realize it will not satisfy everybody, but I looked at the overall history of what has been called Landmarkism from the time of Graves, Pendleton and Dayton. I tried to see what was common with the movement as a whole from that time until the present. It will include some Landmarkers that some other Landmarkers are not willing to recognize as Landmarkers. But I believe it is nevertheless consistent with the movement itself. By the following I am not trying to scripturally define what is a true church, but to recognize the commonality of the churches that have been encompassed by the Landmark movement. A concise summary of the criteria used is listed below:
The church holds the belief that Jesus organized His church during His personal ministry, promised its continued existence, and that church still exists today.
The church holds the belief that baptism is only the immersion of a believer in water by the authority of a local new testament church, and will not receive believers who have been immersed by other churches/denominations.
The church holds the belief that the Lord's supper is restricted to baptized believers who are walking in orderly church capacity. (restricted, including closed and close)
The church holds the belief that the church is a local autonomous body authorized by Jesus Christ to evangelize, baptize, and teach His disciples.
Here is a link to that survey as discussed on the Baptist Board:
http://www.baptistboard.com/showthread.php?t=17022&page=2